Places of the Heart
by Mrpointyhorns
Summary: Stan wants to be thought of as his own person. Kyle thinks it's a conflict of interest to help him. KyleStan Prompt: And.
1. Chapter 1

Title: Places of the Heart

Fandom: South Park

Characters: Stan/Kyle

Prompt: .083. And

Word Count: 1,519

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Stan wants to be thought of as his own person. Kyle thinks its conflict of interest to help him.

Author's Notes: Just funny insecurities of teenagers.

_**And**__ He walks with me, __**and**__ He talks with me,  
__**And**__ He tells me I am His own;  
__**And**__ the joy we share as we tarry there,  
None other has ever known._

Although he was not like Cartman when it came to impressing Craig and those other guys Stan was eager to please the day he was invited to hang out with them. He ran. He worried not about how he became out of breath. He did not pause when he scrapped his leg and tore his pant's leg when he ran too close to that barbed wire fence. The only time he diverted from his path was when he saw Kenny down the way.

He stopped only when he finally arrived at Craig's house. After catching his breath he rang the bell. Craig was watching Red Racer so Tweek was sent to answer the door. Tweek and Tweek alone was the only friend that could enter his chamber of entertainment (the living room) between 4:00 p.m. and 4:30 p.m.

"Hey Stan," Tweek glanced over his shoulder. "I thought you were coming at 4:31."

"Uh well, I just wanted to get here early. That way I wouldn't be late." Stan explained.

Tweek glared. He stepped outside and shut the door. "Will you be quiet? You're going to get me in trouble. If I have to spend a week with Craig not speaking to me because of this..." Tweek's eyes suddenly bulged. They landed on Stan's ripped pant leg. "Stan wh-what happened?"

Stan frowned. Disregarding Tweek's anger at his early arrival he looked down at his leg. It was throbbing in pain from the scrapes he received. The wire had brought a thin trickle of blood. "Wow, I did not even notice that until you told me. It must have happened when I cut through that yard. I thought I made it over the barbed wire."

Tweek twitched. "You were mutilated by metal and then you came here? When was the last time you had your shots?"

"I don't know..."

"You don't know!" Tweek cried. He was shaking in his shoes. "Oh god! The last time I got mine was a few years ago. I'm pretty sure it's still effective but what if it isn't. What if I lose my leg because of this? Oh shit, oh god! What time is it?"

Stan blinked and looked down at his watch. "Thirty five after."

As if on cue the front door reopened and Craig stepped out. The sudden movement caused Tweek to go into a full fledged panic attack. "He's going to kill me!" Tweek yelled. He ran inside and hid carefully under Craig's bed.

Stan looked sheepishly at Craig. "I didn't mean to."

The other boy simply raised his middle finger. He then led Stan to the kitchen where he disinfected and bandaged Stan. Then he pulled out an emergency container of coffee and put it in the microwave to warm it up.

"Tweek," Craig called from the door of his bedroom. "Stan's clean, I promise."

"Is that coffee?" Tweek emerged when the smell hit him. Craig's words reassured him that it was okay. He sagged against the wall at his first sip. "Thanks Craig."

Craig turned to Stan. "So where's Kyle?"

"I don't know? I didn't see him after school." Stan answered.

"Are you fighting?" Tweek was to into his fix to freak.

"No. Did you invite him?" Stan worried. He realized that he had done something wrong. What it was he did not know.

"We invited you. We just thought you understood that meant Kyle too. You're Stan and Kyle." Craig explained. It was logical to him, to Tweek too.

"I'm Stan. When Kyle's here we are Stan and Kyle. If you wanted to hang out with both of us you should have said so."

The two friends exchanged glances. Tweek shook his head and Craig turned to Stan. "We don't want to hang out with Stan. We want to hang out with Stan and Kyle."

"What? Why not?" Stan argued offensive.

"Stan you're just not as good as Stan and Kyle." Tweek explained. He said this with a grin. He knew what Stan was thinking. Tweek knew that only he was okay, but was better off as 'and those guys.' He accepted it. He embraced it. Being 'and those guys' made Craig his best friend. He knew he'd rather be best friends with Craig then be his own person any day. He grinned because he realized that Stan accept this yet, but it was coming.

"So you're saying..."

"You have to leave," Craig smiled at Stan's dumbfounded expression. "But come back when you find Kyle okay dude?"

As the concept that Craig and Tweek explained to him took hold the dumbfounded expression on his face disappeared. "Dude that's fucked up! I'm just as cool as Kyle and Stan and I'm going to prove it! You just wait and see!" With that declared Stan stormed out of the room and out of the house.

Tweek turned to Craig an amused little smile crossed his features. "I think we just witness the beginning of one of Kyle and Stan's great adventures."

"Weak," Craig flipped Tweek off.

The blond reached out grabbing the finger he linked it with his own middle finger. Then he lowered both their hands. Fingers still linked Tweek suggested to his friend. "We better take cover."

Squeezing Tweeks finger he replied, "Close the door and I'll put you under my covers."

Releasing their fingers was the last thing the outside world witnessed before the door was slammed shut.

Stan ran all the way to Kyle's no detour, no stopping, and no injuries. He let himself in without knocking. He flushed when Shelia Broflovski, Kyle's Mom, stopped him in the living room.

"I'm sorry. I let myself in. I need to talk to Kyle." Stan apologized. He panted catching his breath as he waited to be scolded.

"Its okay, Stan. Go on. He's up in his room." She ushered him up. Surprised but not stupid he headed up the stairs. "It's okay Gerald. Stan showed up, everything is alright." Stan could not help over hearing as he made it to the landing.

Stan froze in his spot. Not only did Craig and those guys think he was better off as a pair but so did their parents! Picking up the pace against he hurried into Kyle's room.

"Kyle do you think I'm my own person." Stan said before he was properly in the room.

The redhead did not flinch. He didn't even get sarcastic at the entrance. He simply looked up from his text book and answered him. "Well you are one to follow trends, but for the most part yes you are. What's this about?"

Stan sat himself on Kyle's bed. The redhead was at his desk but he neglected all for Stan. The other boy looked sheepish once again. "Well I sort of went to Craig's today. He invited me over but when I got there he made me leave, because I didn't being you! Apparently inviting me is an automatic invitation for you too! I'm not good enough on my own Kyle. I am good enough only with you."

Kyle flushed a bit at the idea. "Well Stan, I like you for you, but I've never been with you without me. Maybe you should have Kenny follow you around with a camera in my absence."

"Aren't you pissed Kyle? I ditched you!" Stan disregarded Kyle's offer. It was important, to Stan, that Kyle was concerned about his whereabouts after school.

"Stan you couldn't have been there more then fifteen minutes. It's only 4:50! Craig doesn't see anyone before 4:31! Even if your intention was to ditch me, to hang out with him and those guys, I don't care. You don't have to always hang out with me. You're allowed to have other friends." Kyle smiled a bit. He honestly knew that Stan did cared less about being popular or known, and more about feeling justified for feeling guilty about leaving Kyle behind.

Stan sighed in pure relief. Kyle was not mad at him. He even said that he could have other friends. That meant that as long as he did not ditch Kyle for good it would be okay. It meant that Kyle knew that he did not want to lose him as a friend.

Continuing to the subject at hand Stan said, "I need your help Kyle! I need to be my own person. I cannot let Kyle-and-Stan be cooler than Stan!"

"You want MY help? In competing with us?" Kyle stared the logic made no sense whatsoever. Stan must be very worried about this.

Stan understood Kyle's emphasis. "That's silly. But Kyle in public maybe we should try to separate, a little?" He hoped Kyle would not be offended.

"Stan you do whatever you think is best. Frankly I don't care about this whole thing." Kyle could understand that this was just one of Stan's moments. Stan would understand soon that being Stan alone was lonely.

"Okay so tomorrow at school we'll just not hang out, cool?"

"Cool," Kyle turned back to his work.

"Okay great! Sometimes we can hang out after school, so don't worry."

"I'm not."

"Right, I'll see you."

"Bye Stan."


	2. Chapter 2

Title: Places of the Heart

Fandom: South Park

Characters: Stan/Kyle

Prompt: .083. And

Word Count: 1,740

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Stan wants to be thought of as his own person. Kyle thinks its conflict of interest to help him.

Author's Notes: Just funny insecurities of teenagers.

_**And**__ He walks with me, __**and**__ He talks with me,  
__**And**__ He tells me I am His own;  
__**And**__ the joy we share as we tarry there,  
None other has ever known._

The next day when the boys waited for the bus Stan stood away from his friends. He had to break himself away from them, especially Kyle.

The redhead stood lined up with his two other friends. The fattest of the group was still panting from his rush to the bus stop. Kenny was muttering about the porn he watched the night before. And Kyle was snickering at the tale.

"Hey!" A recovered Cartman yelled. "Why the hell am I standing next to the fucking Jew! What the hell is wrong with you Stan?"

"Nothing," Stan called. He refrained to tell Cartman that he tended to stand beside Kyle regardless. "I just want my space."

Kenny yelped looking at Kyle. He was worried about his friend's reaction to this news.

Cartman narrowed his eyes in disbelief. "You two fighting?" Cartman pointed to Kyle then to Stan.

"No," Kyle shook his head. He shrugged at Kenny's skeptical look. "Stan's going to find some interest of his own."

"Oh uh..."

"Dude! So sweet," Cartman grinned. He wondered if this was the day Stan and Kyle became a thing of the past. That would be totally awesome one of them would need a new best friend. It was the day he had been waiting for since he started picking on Pip.

Kenny put a sympathetic hand on Kyl'e shoulder. The redhead would have soothed the worried blond but the bus pulled up. "HURRY UP! SIT DOWN!"

Stan sat in the third row of the bus. He rode the entire way with the thoughts of who was sitting next to Kyle. He dare not look unless he blow his new project.

"Hey Stan," Pip turned from the seat in front of him. "Are you fighting with Kyle?"

"Don't talk to me Pip," Stan hissed. He wouldn't give the Brit a decent answered. He did not want people seeing him talking to Pip.

Needless to say he was glad to arrive at school. He practically jumped off the bus running to his locker. He took his time on the way to class however.

"Hey Kenny can I trade seats with you?" Stan asked his friend. Wordlessly Kenny moved from his seat and sat down beside Kyle. The redhead frowned. He really did not think Stan would take it this far.

Stan took Kenny's seat next to Cartman. The bigger boy smiled. "Hey Stan," He greeted.

"Look Cartman. I'm trying to be my own person. That means I can't simply go from being Stan and Kyle to Stan and Cartman." The raven-haired boy explained. Cartman huffed but said nothing.

Stan stole a glance at Kyle. He felt more confident doing this knowing that Kyle supported him. His best friend was laughing with Kenny. Stan reminded himself that he wanted this. Being Stan alone mean that Kyle potentially could become an and with Kenny. It might even help his case. After all he could not be a part of Kyle and Stan if Kyle was an and to someone else. Still he bit back a rage of jealousy at Kyle's unconcerned attitude.

"Hey Stan, are you fighting with Kyle?" Wendy stood in front of his desk. Bebe was beside her.

"Nah, I just need my space." Stan reassured his former girlfriend.

"I told you Wendy. They're seeing other people now," Bebe stage whispered to Wendy. Then very concerned she turned to Stan, "If you need someone to talk to Stan..."

"All right class lets get started," the teacher called their attention, interrupting Bebe and Wendy's conversation. The teacher froze a moment looking between the super best friends, she frowned. Burying in the back of her mind, to question them later, she started the class.

--

When lunch arrived Stan's fourth teacher called him aside. Enis Ock was Stan's math teacher. He also taught Kyle's seventh period pre-cal class.

"I understand that sometimes boys your age are confused Stan, but I've seen that boys your age can be in love. Now is there something wrong between you and Kyle?" Mr. Ock asked. He was a very dry man with a love only for numbers, his interest in Stan's relationship with Kyle was surprising.

"Er...well I'm just trying to open doors and branch out. Nothing is wrong." He was surprised to find that many of his casual contacts thought that he and Kyle were dating or something like that. He ignored the assumption this time. The last three teachers had been upset at his denial. He even got his foreign language teacher to cry.

"Okay, well just know that you can talk to me." He offered before letting Stan go.

Stan hurried to lunch. He wanted to tell Kyle about what had happened to him so far that day. It was only after he got his hot lunch that he remembered that he was steering clear of Kyle.

Instead, he ate standing up. Then he went outside. He did not know what else to do. So he stared at his shoes.

This was not turning out the way he had wanted. How could he be a cool individual and not a loser loner? Did no one survive without being part of a group of friends? Bebe had Wendy, Craig had those guys, Butters...wait Butters who did he hang out with? He seemed to float pretty nicely: taking places of voids in a group, living well with threats at his life and sexuality, he had even taken up causes with Stan when his best friend was not around. Besides, he also hung out with Craig and those guys, too!

Still it was Butters? A sweet kid but could he actually call someone friend? Kyle invited him places occasionally, even when only his closest friends were invited, but Kyle was a nice guy.

Kyle, he was a great friend, the very best! Could Stan balance being Kyle's best friend and his own person? Did he have to be Butters, a filler, a floater, a taunt for boys Kyle wanted to piss off?

Stan raised his head, finding Kyle immediately. He stood with Kenny on the other side of the courtyard. All the boys played wall ball, or touched football, or basketball at lunch. Butter's had joined the group of four. He was filling Stan's—no Kenny was taking his spot and Butters held Kenny's because no one could ever fill Cartman's.

Stuffing his hands in his pockets Stan was determined to make a name for himself, even if that meant leaving Kyle behind...

The bell cut his self questioning off. He could figure it out after school, then he could talk to Kyle about it.

--

Straight after school Stan went over to Kyle's. The other boy would help Stan figure out what to do next. Standing by alone at lunch was just not cutting it. This time he did not let himself in and Stan thought he heard Shelia sniffling as he headed to Kyle's room.

"Kyle you wouldn't believe how many people think that you and I are dating!" Stan said a note of humor in his voice. "And I think I need to talk to Butters and see how he...does it?"

"How I do what?" Butters sat on Kyle's floor against his bed. Kenny laid on the bed his eyes closed. Kyle was at his desk chair facing the two other boys.

"What are you doing here?" Stan raised a brow. He felt another twinge of jealousy and an even bigger twinge of regret. He had to remind himself that he had chosen to steer clear of Kyle and not the other way around.

"The question is; what are you doing here?" Kenny was on his feet. He raised his fists ready for a fight. "You shouldn't treat Kyle like he's anything less then your best friend."

"Kenny, look I'm just trying to be my own person that does not mean that Kyle's not my best friend." Stan held his hands up in surrendering. "Come on Kyle tell him."

"It's alright Kenny," Kyle turned to the blond. "Stan's allowed to find other hobbies, friends, and his own person."

The redhead waited for Kenny to reseat himself. He sat like a dog ready to attack on command. Then Kyle turned back to Stan. "I do think its okay that you want to be your own person you. I do not think I should help you. To be your own person you have to accomplish that on your own."

"Are you kicking me out?" Stan's initial shock blocked the emotions of hurt, betrayal and loss. He searched Kyle's face and body language for any signs of a joke. "You are!"

"Watch it," Kenny growled.

"I'm not kicking you out, but if you stay it's not to discuss your new image or your interesting conversation with the school staff. Although you may speak to Butters about how he does it, but that's only if he's willing." Kyle calmly stated.

"How I do what fellas?" Butters innocently asked despite the high tensions radiating off the friends.

"But, Kyle!" Stan ignored Butters once again. He even overlooked Kenny's heated gaze. All he wanted was to understand Kyle. It was clear that Kyle understood something that he did not. The only thing he could think of was that he had a new lesson that he was in the process of learning. From past experience he usually had to continue learning it until it was learnt because he would never understand it until then.

"You're not supporting me at all in this. I thought you were behind me. You don't care at all about who I am!" Stan opted to say the only thing that made sense to him. He waved an accusing finger at Kyle.

"I do support you, but Stan. It's conflicted interest for me to help you became Stan with out Kyle!" Kyle turned away from his friend.

If Stan was less angry then he would notice the way Kyle's face fell and how his shoulders slumped. As it was, Stan was angrier then he had even known especially at Kyle. "Fine! I'll learn to be myself without you!" Stan ran from the room and out of the house. He moved too fast and too loudly to really hear Shelia Broflovski cry.

He ran all the way home and threw himself onto his bed. Buried under the covers he pretended that he did not care that Kyle did not want to help him.


	3. Chapter 3

Title: Places of the Heart

Fandom: South Park

Characters: Stan/Kyle

Prompt: .083. And

Word Count: 1,740

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Stan wants to be thought of as his own person. Kyle thinks its conflict of interest to help him.

Author's Notes: Just funny insecurities of teenagers.

_**And**__ He walks with me, __**and**__ He talks with me,  
__**And**__ He tells me I am His own;  
__**And**__ the joy we share as we tarry there,  
None other has ever known._

After Stan's not unusual emotional break down; he did some internet research. He found that when a teenager wanted to find his own person and basically be different then his peers, but still remain somewhat cool, that they had to turn punk. Punk was different then Goths because punks had apathy while the Goths had empathy. The steps it took to become punk was nothing more then a change of clothes, a disregard for rules and most likely some type of smoking.

"Dad?" Stan stood in the entrance way to the living room. The scientist had a baseball game on the television, but he watched his beer bottle.

Randy startled sitting upright. "Stan! Finally joining your father for a sports game?"

"Rockies?" Stan questioned.

"Yankees versus Red Sox," Randy corrected with a smile, the rivals was always a crowd pleaser.

"No. Can you drive me to the mall? I need new clothes," Stan explained.

"Is there a new trend?" Randy perked up. He always wanted to be part of the in-crowd.

"Not really."

"You're not doing the metro thing again are you?" Randy worried. Although he had caught up in not-so-cool trends in the past (like the 80's man-short shorts) he thought metro was by far the worst trend.

"No!" Stan reassured. He did not question how similar the assumption that he was going metro went along with his teachers' assumption that he was gay. "I need to find my own person. I'm going punk."

"Punk?! Wow that does sound cool!" Randy grabbed his keys leaving his half drunk beer on the table.

--

Punk as far as color was not very much different then goth. Except with goth they wore soft turtlenecks and black jeans. Punks wore girl pants, tight shirts under leather jackets, and collars. Stan had one around his neck and two leather bands around his wrists. He also wore leather boots. Randy Marsh suggested and paid for the last change, a tongue ring.

"Woah! Man did that hurt?" Clyde asked. He, Token, Bebe, and Wendy took interest in his new look and Kyle was no where to be seen. That was a good thing right?

"Yeah," Stan was happy that he did not receive a lisp from the ring. "But not right away, only when I started eating again."

"That's neat Stan. I heard that they make kissing even better." Wendy said. She leaned forward giving Stan the chance to look down her shirt.

He stepped back. "Yeah I'll get back to you on that."

"Wendy," Token warned his girlfriend. She always wanted what she could not have.

All action and conversation ended when the bell rang. The five friends groaned at the annoyance. "Well see you later, Stan?" Bebe wondered. She had class in another building.

Wendy also had class in another building but she stayed put. Bebe and the other boys stared at her. "Aren't you coming Stan?" Wendy asked. She pursued her lips, she continued, "Because your attire should not affect your studies. I know punks like to rebel from the man, but that's not cool. Without trying you're an average student. If you want to get into college you'll need to try a bit more."

Stan's mouth gaped open. He suddenly felt relieved that he no longer pined for Wendy. She was too bossy. Kyle was easy going compared to her. That was until yesterday.

"I was planning to go to class." Stan admitted. He knew that he needed to disregard rules to be a punk, but he did not want to get detention either.

"Good I'm glad my talk helped."

"Right, okay," Stan led the way. Why his locker happened to be in a building that none of his classes were in always confused him.

The class was half full when Stan led the others inside. Kenny sat firmly beside Kyle. Stan did not notice nor did he see the surprised looks of Kenny or Butters. He certainly did not see Kyle's look of unsurprised.

Stan sat in what used to be Kenny's seat.

When the final bell rang, the final person stumbled in. "Mrs. Vulva! Mrs. Vulva, I have an announcement to make," Cartman skidded to a halt in front of his teacher's desk. He huffed a little trying to catch his breath.

Now Mrs. Vulva tended to think the best of people and was very gullible. So without sarcasm or any sign of anger she agreed, "Of course, you should be a reporter Eric."

"Thank you," Cartman turned to the class. He pulled out a poster he drew up earlier. Holding it up, he read the caption. "Craig and Tweek are missing!"

He turned to stable the missing poster, poster next to the white board in the front of the class. "They have not been seen since Monday. That's three days and four if this day ends without them!" Eric continued. "Furthermore I checked with the cable company. Between 4 and 5 the television in Craig's house has been off!"

A loud gasp sounded. Before this information the issue was as simple as a flu virus. No flu would keep Craig away from Red Racer.

"Tweek's home has also received no programming during that time. Personally I blame Clyde, Token and Jimmy. They conspired to get them out of the picture. They were jealous of the pair. Like Stan, they no longer wanted to be a side project to Craig. Tweek, well he just got in the way."

"Cartman!" Kyle scolded. The three accused to shocked to be bothered.

"Fine, but you better watch it Kahl," Cartman nudged his head in Stan's direction. "Anyway this evening if the two boys have not shown, I will organize a search and rescue for them. I'll do everything in my POWER to find them. Anyone willing is allowed to help."

"Very nice Eric," Mrs. Vulva clapped her hands. "Clyde, Token, Jimmy please go to the front office. I'm sure you'll need to be questioned."

"B-b-but," Jimmy stuttered.

"Go! Stan you need to go as well for Kyle's protection."

"Mrs. Vulva I do not think that's necessary," Kyle protested. He was more than a little annoyed. He could be learning something instead of watching Cartman manipulate their teacher.

"Are you sure?" Mrs. Vulva asked. She watched at the other three boys left.

The redhead wanted to roll his eyes but he refrained. He nodded his head instead.

--

Despite his declaration, Cartman's words hit the students in their gullible hearts. Kyle increasingly became annoyed. Even so it did not stop Stan from becoming his own person.

That day at lunch he lit a cigarette in the boys' bathroom. Nervously he placed the end into his mouth and sucked in a deep breath of air. Obviously Stan did not know how to smoke.

He began choking almost immediately. His eyes started to burn and water up, and finally his asthma kicked in, making it even harder to catch his breath. Blind from the tears, Stan searched his bag for his inhaler. It was a useless attempt.

As it became increasingly difficult to breath, Stan began to wonder if all of this was worth becoming his own person.

He wobbled on his feet losing his balance as his body fought simply to breath. The impact to his knees was incredible. He cried out at the sharp pain. The thought of the germ infested tile did nothing to keep him from keening over because of the pain.

"Stan!" Rang through his ears. It was Kyle. Stan knew the voice without fail. Within moments plastic was pressed to his lips and his inhaler meds began to open his smoke filled lungs.

Several minutes past before things came into focus and Stan could once again breathe properly. "Kyle?" Stan moaned his agony of earlier still lingering.

"Idiot! What the fuck were you doing? Smoking! That wouldn't help you find yourself. In fact, I think it's far from it. You, the person I know, went raw foods and eco friendly the moment you learned about it. Smoking? That's not the Stan I know."

Stan blushed. He was no longer only eat fresh organic foods but he still preferred them over processed junk, Kyle was right. "I wasn't thinking, I guess. That's what punk rebels do, right?"

"Stan being a punk rebel is not being your own person, it's being one of them," Kyle pointed out. "Wouldn't you rather be one with me instead of one of them?"

Stan flushed for a moment. Then he shook his head. "I don't know. I want to be myself, but I still want to have my own friends. I don't want to be like Butters."

"I think you should be yourself _with_ your friends. If other people can't see you passed the friends you keep, then fuck 'em," Kyle stood from the floor. He offered to help Stan up, and he took it. "If you still want to, you can try to be a person on your own."

"I..." Stan was not sure. Kyle was being helpful and he actually made sense. Something that he must have been doing all along, Stan concluded. Still Stan felt offended. He did not want to be grouped and labeled. Not by Craig and Tweek or anyone. Craig and Tweek?

Suddenly the bathroom door flew open. Kenny stumbled in with Cartman, Butters slipped in behind them.

"Told ya! Stan got him alone," Cartman one-upped Kenny.

Kenny narrowed his eyes on Stan. Then he turned his glare on Kyle. "What are you doing wandering off with conspirers?"

"How did you escape them?" Stan curiously asked himself.

"I told them that they could hold my dick for me or they could back off," Kyle explained bitterly. "Butters almost thought I was serious."

"Butters," Stan glared at him, "That's not cool."

"Ah fellas he's going to attack me!" Butters hid behind Cartman.

The brunette took his role of protector very seriously. He stepped forward pointing a finger at Stan. "You were the last person to see Craig and Tweek, right? Wait what the hell are you wearing?"

"Clothes." Stan liked his clothes despite the collar.

"Well you and your clothes should hang out with them?" Cartman japed his thumb towards the door in the supposed direction of 'them'.

"Them?"

"The punks," Cartman watched Stan's face fall. "Yes Stan, the rebels you know the ones that want to be their own person all dress, act, and talk the same. They don't want to be different they just don't want to be normal."

"Shit," Stan glared at his clothes. He knew there were other punks he just never released how many. "Damn it!" Stan felt like he would much rather be Stan and Kyle then one of them.

"Fuck!" He muttered just before he stormed out of the room.

"Stan," Kyle called after him but he did not follow.

--


	4. Chapter 4

Title: Places of the Heart

Fandom: South Park

Characters: Stan/Kyle

Prompt: .083. And

Word Count: 1,519

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Stan wants to be thought of as his own person. Kyle thinks its conflict of interest to help him.

Author's Notes: Just funny insecurities of teenagers.

_**And**__ He walks with me, __**and**__ He talks with me,  
__**And**__ He tells me I am His own;  
__**And**__ the joy we share as we tarry there,  
None other has ever known._

--

Stan arrived home worn out and disappointed. He changed into his normal clothes but kept in his tongue jewelry in. He returned to his father's side hoping for some sort of advice. He was not that lucky this time.

"Stan I'm in charge of the west South Park's search Party," Randy Marsh explained to his son. He even had a shiny badge. "Tweek's the little blond one right?"

"Yes, but Dad I'm sure they're fine. I need help. The punk thing did not turn out." Stan explained ignoring his father's gullible nature.

"Really?" Randy frowned. The boy's father soon got over Stan's change of pace. He smiled at his duties as a parent kicked in. "Then you're grounded."

"What?"

"You disregarded rules, illegally brought cigarettes and put a hole in your tongue." He explained to his son, "Grounded, two weeks."

"Dad you wanted me to get it pierced!" Stan whined feeling rather like he was tricked. "You even bought me the cigarettes and told me to ditch class."

"I was being supportive," Randy defended. "Do you want to make it three weeks?"

"No," Stan muttered, with a sigh. He did not think this was fair but he was used to his father's strange logic.

"Where's Kyle?" Randy suddenly asked. "I have not seen him for a while. Are you fighting? Did you kill him!?"

"No! I'm just trying to be my own person. We're not fighting, not anymore. He's very supportive of me." Stan argued. He sometimes could not believe how gullible his father was.

"Stan, you do not have to change. Kyle already likes you for who you are. If you change too much you may find that Kyle isn't into you anymore. _You_might not like _him_ anymore," Randy explained even further.

For a man that was so easy to fool, his insight hit home. No wonder Kyle had been so upset. He probably realized what Stan did not. He probably thought that Stan did not want to be friends with him anymore. It was not true of course but he understood where both his father and his friend were coming from.

As Stan thought, he began to remember how lonely he had felt that first day. How he thought he would have to be like Butters connected to everyone but friend to no one. Stan wondered if that life was more fulfilling. Did he want to even test it? IT was not like he would be losing Kyle to another best friend. If he continued he would be losing every best friend that he could ever have, and that included a friendship of a future lover.

"I don't want that," Stan agreed coming to his senses. "I want Kyle."

Randy raised an eyebrow. He smiled a little, "Great, Stan. Go get him. I'm going to the West side of South Park."

"I thought I was grounded." Stan had to question his father's slip.

"Well you are, but its _Kyle_. You're meant to be together." Randy explained. He went on, adding, "It's not simply that you're better as a pair, but that you are more satisfied and happier when he is around. I don't know much but I know you don't let that sort of thing disappear."

Stan nodded slowly. Why did it sound like Randy was talking about a lover and not a best friend? Did everyone think he was gay for Kyle? How was it that he was the last to even think about that idea? None of these questions were asked, because Randy hurried outside leaving Stan to shove the questions aside.

After bundling up Stan went in search of Kyle. It turned out that Kyle's protectors forced him to accompany them in their search party. They combed the North side of South Park in freezing winds as Kyle pouted and complained.

At Stan's arrival his complaining stopped. None of his body guards looked up from their searching. So Kyle darted behind a building and dragged Stan with him.

Stan stared at Kyle. The redhead pressed him into a wall of an abandoned warehouse. He placed a finger to his lips and silenced Stan's protests.

The taller boy stared down at his friend. He wondered about their close contact. It seemed like they were full of close contact. Were the flips of his stomach also common place in his relationship? How did he not notice?

Stan easily accepted the contact; he put an arm around Kyle's waist and pulled him close. They waited quietly for the search party to completely pass. Stan noticed that his jeans became tight as the minutes ticked by, but he suppressed the idea that it meant anything.

He could admit that he liked being close to Kyle. He even like how he smelt, cinnamon. He also knew that he would not mind taking the risk of dating Kyle.

Finally Kyle pulled back. He stepped away looking flushed and happy. "Thank God you came to save me," Kyle smirked. "And you changed."

Stan nodded dumbly. He opened his mouth to reply but nothing came out, so he closed it. Open, close, open, close, open, "Beautiful."

"What? Fuck Stan, are you okay?" Kyle worried.

"No, I mean yes, I guess so," Stan promptly reassured although, he was not very good at putting Kyle's worry at easy. "It's nothing."

Kyle's face fell. Before Stan could take it back and make him smile again Kyle spoke. "Let's talk." He grabbed Stan's hand and carefully dodged the search parties as they slipped away to talk.

"What's going on," Kyle said once they were a safe distance away. He still led Stan by the hand.

"Kyle, honestly do you think I'm my own person," Stan asked, diverting the subject.

"Stan, of course. You're a great person, and if we never met, or we grow apart you would still be a great person, without me." Kyle sighed. He turned his head staring at a large snow bank on the side of the road. "I do not want you to be alone though. I don't want to be alone either. I like myself as Kyle, but I like myself better with you. I am a better person when you're around."

"Are we dating?" Stan asked. He did not realize that he asked it until it was asked, and it was a strange question to ask considering the topic.

Kyle laughed. "No Stan. We're friends, very close friends."

"Oh," Stan sighed. He knew it all along. So why did he feel so disappointed.

Kyle face became serious. He stopped. He turned to face Stan. "I've come to believe that just about anyone can find some comfort in each other and fall in love. If the circumstances are right and both people are open to it, then it can become something even more."

Stan rubbed the back of his neck, and looked down at his toes shyly. He could see the invitation in Kyle's words. "Yes." He softly answered, without having to reason it out. He was willing and open to making this work.

"Is that how you ask?" Kyle teased. He put folded his arms looking a little crossed. His smile broke through however when he asked, "Stan, do you want to go steady with me?"

"Kay," Stan agreed. "But you better treat me as an individual."

"Yes, Princess," Kyle smiled, tilting his head. "Come on. I think I know where to find Craig and Tweek. I checked with the television company too. Tweak's Coffee has received programming between 4 and 4:30. They'll want to know that our adventure is over."

"Our adventure?" Stan frowned. It took him only a minute to catch on. There disappearance occurred right after he had gone over to Craig's on Monday. When he decided that he did not want to be Stan and Kyle. Now, he knew that being Stan and Kyle made Kyle his best friend. He realized now that he would rather be part of Kyle's and, then to be Stan on his own. He understood that he was his own person, but perhaps maybe Kyle was the lucky one, to really see it. Stan would not change that for anything.


End file.
